Tears Ayuen: PRESIDENT KIIR BULLIES BASHIR IN MY DREAM

PRESIDENT KIIR BULLIES BASHIR IN MY DREAM

Last night, I had a dream

In my dream,

President Kiir visits his ailing partner,

President Omar Hassan Bashir

Bashir contracted diarrhea,

A chronic diarrhea

Coz he drank unclean water from river Nile

He couldn’t afford bottled water

He is broke

Oil production got shutdown by Kiir

Bashir ekes out

Handouts from Arab League

After Kiir gave him emotional and moral strength,

He asks him what his say is

In regards to the outstanding CPA issues;

The Abyei,

Border issues,

Oil transit fees,

And nationality question

Before answering Kiir,

He gets up,

Runs to the toilet

Spends half an hour in there

He comes back,

Stands by the door,

And breathes heavily

It’s here Kiir sees his full body frame

Silhouetting in an ankle-length loose white Jalabia

The beer-belly he acquired

Through South Sudan oil money shrinks;

It’s disappearing

His ribs protrude

Kiir counts them

They’re ten

Two of them got surgically removed

After he got shot by Kerubino Kuanyin Bol

During a one-on-one meeting somewhere in Omdurman

In the 90s,

An incident that went unreported for fear of

Grand official butchering of reporters

Along with their families

“I beg your pardon, repeat your question,

Ya baba Mayar”, he asks Kiir

Before Kiir finishes shooting the same question for the second time,

Bashir dashes into the toilet again,

Leaving Kiir seething with rage;

Agitated,

Irritated

Kiir plunges into a sea of thoughts,

Trying to figure out how

 He will make bashir speak his language

Bashir comes back,

Holding a small bluish container

For keeping water used in place of toilet roll

He fills it up with water from an old pot

And places it near the door

He sits on an old mat

Made from reeds

People say his wife got the mat from a neighbor

Immediately after auctioneers

Stormed in Bashir’s house

 And confiscated the furniture;

They were sent by the landlord

Who grew impatient

After Bashir failed to pay February rent

Back to the point:

Bashir begins to respond to Kiir

He starts off by telling Kiir to go to hell

Coz he ain’t letting any other thing

Slip through his fingers

 Since he allowed south to go it alone as

An independent state through the 2011 referendum

Kiir begs him to reduce oil transit fee demand;

From $36 to 40 cents per barrel

Kiir also implores him to leave Abyei alone

But still, Bashir insists that Kiir goes to hell

And races to the toilet again

He spends his good time in there

Provoked by Bashir’s attitude,

Kiir grows smarter

He hatches a plan

And waits till Bashir comes back

Salva says he wants to use the toilet

Bashir directs Kiir:

“Go straight on; turn left, turn left again.

It’s the one with

 A green door next to the gate”

Salva leaves, taking along the Citizen Newspaper

He takes his time in there

Ten minutes elapse,

Still no sign of Kiir

Now the worst happens

Bashir gets pressed again;

Remember he has a running stomach

He rushes toward the toilet, the only toilet

Only to find it locked from inside

Salva is in, reading the newspaper

Atlala bara ya Salva. Ena taban

What are you doing in there?”

Bashir panics

But Kiir keeps mum

“Knock knock knock”

He knocks, he pushes the door

Kiir whistles

As he turns pages of the newspaper,

He scans through the stories

Pretending to find an interesting story to read

Finally, Kiir breaks the silence:

 “What do you think of my proposals?”

Bashir says they will discuss the issues back in the house

Kiir declines

And keeps reading the paper

Bashir begs Kiir, saying

“Please get out; I will sponsor 100 south Sudanese university students”

Kiir says thanks but that’s not what I want

With his left hand patting buttocks

And the right hand on the stomach;

Bashir begins to talk: “okay okay okay okay,

I’m proposing a meeting with you, just two us.

And it will be mediated by Obama himself”

Kiir resumes whistling

“Kiir please let me use the latrine,

Don’t let me do it in my pants

Kiir you are causing a scene;

My wives kids are milling around

And I can see my neighbors peering

I’ll do anything you want me to.

I will return all the barrels I confiscated,

 I’ve given up Abyei. I…….

…..Ding…….dong…..Ding…dong,

My mobile phone rang,

Waking me from the dream

By: Tears Ayuen

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