Miss Amer Mayen Dhieu: Don’t Let Your Vision Be Blurred By You And Cynic!
7 min readBy Peter Ngor Atem, Nairobi, Kenya
May 8, 2015 (SSB) — I must clear the air from the onset that I don’t physically know my sister Amer. She doesn’t know me as well. Nor do we interact on social media directly. Our paths only meet when we go on a ‘normal walking spree’ on Facebook. That is when we bump to each other’s posts and obviously comment or like. If she ascertains that Pakeer-Patriot Ngor Atem is the pen-name of this writer on Facebook, definitely, she’ll confirm that info for my avid readers.
Fortuitously, my reliable conscience informs me of a beautiful, focused, brilliant,learned young Twic lady who is expectant of better societies in South Sudan. More specifically,societies which are gender-sensitive, or ,iniconceivably though, gender-blind.
She is a lone warrior from fearsome Dachuek clan of Twic East County whose top agenda is a progressive feminism. A lady who wants to pull down the Berlin wall of patriarchy. She jealously craves for a levelled playing field for all sexes-the males,the females and maybe the transgendered. Your fight is reminiscent of and a crystallization on the theses advanced by a great socialist feminist,Susan Faludi,who once asserted that “with the mystery of men’s non-rebellion commensurate with women’s and,in the course of it,to create a new paradigm for human progress that will open doors for both sexes . That was ,and continues to be ,feminism’s dream ,to create a freer, more humane world”.
In the words of Prof. Wangari Mathaai ,Miss Amer’s message is echoing the opaque objects that the ‘distinction between men and women is not determined by the human anatomy below the belt, but what there is between the ears.’ Without belabouring much, Miss Amer is a feminist -an advocate of women’s rights. In rhyme with me,she believes that Human Anatomy is taken into account when constructing social roles such as cooking to women, hunting to men and so on and so forth. Woefully, feminism is a furious battle. It is met with massive opposition from left,right and center. A feeble-hearted person can’t stand that intense heat emitted by anti-feminism warlords. Many rose and formidably fought for it but failed in the long run. It is irrefutably not a walk in the park.
In the same vein, when I see you cornered by men and women whose agenda is to blur your quest for an empowered womanhood in South Sudan, I cry . I cry because what racks my brain is how Africa loves killing its sun. The Africans are their own adversaries in all forms of fight. They develop a cataract and glue it on others’ eyes with intent to blur their vision. Extravagantly,they like being a stumbling block in a way of progressive fellas. I have avidly read your pieces on your Facebook page and other ones in WWW.Paanluel Wel regarding them.They ardently opposed you on women’s issues: they don’t want women to be freed from male chauvinism.
Luckily though, you irredeemably demolished their hegemony. Utmost, your resilience and lion-heartiness made you move the mountains in this fight. Chief among them being the article directed at Garang John and other SSTV crews in regard to a sexualized,explicit video of a young lady once aired on SSTV.
That is the 1st CATARACT blurring your vision.
However,your vision confuses people sometimes. You started developing a cataract which is now encroaching upon your vision. Some including this writer may accuse you of double-speak, and witch-hunting of male gender. Your agitation is open to translation that you are fighting men,not feminism. Your tongue BADLY slips in more times than one when posting on your Facebook page.
And that make many men fail to draw a thin line between feminism and encroachment on men’s territorial integrity. For instance,you sometimes resort to mobilising women against men on your Facebook page. You’re somewhat notorious on gender-based social construction of roles trying hard to undo the obvious. And sometimes, advocacy for single-motherhood and disrespect to men are conspicuous in your expositions.
Stuff like lionizing ladies to be scornful to their ‘better halves’ or in a simple tongue, make their husbands perform the household management activities while they are streaming the ‘Mexican Soap Operas ‘ in the living room. Eti, after a long day work, a 32 -year-old tout of a Matatu plying Konyokonyo-Lologo Camp (almost impassable) route to venture into domestic chores e.g fetching water,cooking ,changing kids’ napkins, washing cutlery et cetera. We we we! Amerda, that is a fairytale-can only be seen in movies. It is a first class wishful thinking! Your vision is as peaceful as a baby’s sigh but this methodology is as controversial as Mike ‘Sonko’ Mbuvi of Kenya.
At wholesale, you are not badly off. You can polish up on this,sister.
That is the 2nd CATARACT blurring your vision.
In Swahili,they say that ‘Adui ya mwanamke ni mwanamke mwenzake’ ( the woman’s sworn enemy is her fellow woman). Do fellow women support you in pursuit of women’s liberation? The answer is plainly NO because what I see them do is not in sync with your hunger for their betterment.
They call you names. Some christen you as a nagger,an attention-seeker,a braggart to name but a few. Some are tempted to call you a lunatic girl because a solitary voice of reason is conventionally conceptualized as lunacy. They greatly go contrary to your scriptural teachings. And most deplorably, they misconstrue your push for sex empowerment to mean sexual objectification. They sexually objectify themselves in pretext of furthering female-gender empowerment.
To sample some of the obscenities, SOME girls go clubbing crazily like boys from 6 PM to 6 AM. Some bleach their naturally beautiful black African skins. Some smoke and drink. Many use ‘F’ word unashamedly. Some expose themselves to pre-mature sexual engagements. In fulfilment of ‘my dress,my choice sloganeering’ MANY girls dress scantily hence leaving almost nothing to imagination.
Contemptibly,anything African to SOME of them is backward, non-stylish,abominable and unschooled! You see the irony!!
Is this the women’s empowerment you are at fore front agitating for? I hope not. But then,it is counter-productive to your noble quest. It is tarnishing the mainstream fight to which you are committed tooth and nail. In this sense, it is the women who are impeding your highly spirited fight. They’re stabbing you at the back,sister. They want men to form a bad picture of your fight. And that is why some Men Online are cynical of you. They’re skeptical of the importance attached on women’s empowerment.
That is the 3rd CATARACT blurring your vision.
In finality, you need to work overtime in order to unveil yourself from a wrap of misconfiguration and misconstruction many people are seemingly clutching at. Shift the paradigm of your approach to socialist-liberal feminism since this radical feminism you’re advancing is working contrariously to your expected end-product.
I am tendering the aforementioned advice in confirmation of a treatise put forward by the great feminist ,Florynce Kennedy, as follows: “men are outraged,turned off,and wigged out ,by threats that women might withdraw consent to oppression ,because they-men- subconsciously know that they-men- are oppressed”. And indeed as women emotionally defend ,the men are psychologically offended.
Don’t advocate to have men domiciled in the kitchens or coerced into changing kids’ diapers! Rather, ask them to slowly but surely treat women as co-equals. Not as objects or investments as perceived in the Indian cultural beliefs. Not as kitchen dwellers and birth givers as the typical African sexists would conjecture. Hardly push for a unisex approach if tackling women’s issues is anything to go by! Both men and women must be seen in front line for this battle to be won.
Over and above all, rally the support of all women especially the technological savvies behind you,sister Amer! Tell them to toe your footsteps instead of unknowingly blowing it out of the proportion. Aheu Deng Kudum , Aleko Aguer Arok and Adhieu Majok can help in that endeavor if and when you employ their services.
By so doing,you’ll have removed all CATARACTS blurring your vision. And the struggle will continue.
Peter Ngor Atem is a South Sudanese student of Law at the University of Nairobi, Nairobi,Kenya. He is reachable at ngorpeters@gmail.com
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