PaanLuel Wël Media Ltd – South Sudan

"We the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much, with so little, for so long, we are now qualified to do anything, with nothing" By Konstantin Josef Jireček, a Czech historian, diplomat and slavist.

I AM A CITIZEN, NO MATTER WHAT

3 min read

By everything,
I am a citizen of this country
My government is what I am allegiant to
Its citizens too
Amongst them are my kids, wife,
Father, mother, brothers and sisters

Like any other citizen, I have a responsibility
Practically, I protect, preserve the sovereignty of my birthplace
My cause is simple
It is a matter of life and death;
I spill blood
Blood of he who disrespects my country
Blood of he who dares call me an insect
I shoot the bastard between the eyes
Blaow!!
Or I just sink my bayonet deep into his chest
Strip him of his shiny boots and
Jerbania and belt
Leaving the son of a bitch writhing
His ass leaking with dung, human’s

When fighting pauses
I trudge to my base, weak and starving
I took my last meals seven days ago
But it’s okay coz I am used to no food
I eat irregularly
I am waifish, malnourished;
Physically weak
But I consider it temporary weakness
Because whenever a warfare erupts
The weakness flies away,
Leaving a sinewy triggerman
That’s what I was raised to be

Look:
When I was in mum’s womb
I could hear the sound of gunshots
My mother shook my head
As she ran helter-skelter
For our dear lives
At two or so
I saw what was going down with my own eyes
I could see my people felled like trees
I saw houses burn to ashes
At six, instead of learning a-e-i-o-u
I chose something else
Ak-47
I learnt how to fire the shit

As you can tell
My career is about heads
I simply blow them off
During the long engagement
I stayed loyal
I obeyed every command barked at me
By my superiors
With empty stomach
I attacked, captured, liberated towns

I was ever in frontline
While my bloods rotted in refugee camps
Got eaten alive by starvation
Yet those of my superiors
Lived, schooled in foreign neighboring towns
As they got fattened by their mums
That frequently received dollars

My comrades and I were promised
Good life after the civil war
What happened to the promises?
Or did they die along with Garang?
The guys above seem to be celebrating success
They are adding weight day by day
They are now fat-necks
I feel duped, fooled, cheated, and lied to

The truth of the matter is
I subsist on mango fruits, ripe ones
I survive on grass too, sometimes
Not because I like grass
But because the situation dictates it
Yes I get remunerations
Very inadequate
My learned cousins call it peanuts
Tripling it would not help
I am married, with kids
I can’t describe the situation
My family faces
Coz I don’t want to make you cry

For the love of my country
That outweighs everything else
I won’t do anything stupid a disgruntled soldier does
I can’t complain either
Coz only the infirm complain
I will soldier on, with dignity
Until my death gives me a call

Remember, as you take your meals today,
I, your defender, still live on mango
I am now on my way to H…..
Should I come back, I will tell you more

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