Two Years Later: Tributes in Loving Memory of My Dad, Mayendit Arok Nul Lual

By Lual Mayendit Arok, Juba, South Sudan

Wednesday, September 23, 2020 (PW) — Born early in 1950s, around Mayen area presently known as Baping. His mother, Anyieth Kuot Dut (Pakeer, pan Anyuon) married by Arokdit Nul Lual Deng from Dachuek Community in the present day Nyuak Payam, Twic East county.  Anyieth Kuot (Mayendit’s mother) is the first wife of Arokdit Nul Lual, the elder son of Nul-Chuoi Lual Deng.

Mayen’s fate started when his father Arok Nul married Anyieth Kuot and misunderstanding arose from his parents when Mayendit was born. He never enjoyed his infancy soon after his parents were on and off to local courts in Pawel of Kongor district by then. He had his second follower by name Lual Arok who was abandoned soon he was born and Anyieth Kuot Dut passes on.

Mayen’s brother, Lual died later (reason of death is known to us exclusively). Mayen left alone in the then differences of his parents, and alone in the world after his blood brother also died. That was the start of the beginning of my father’s life. The struggles in survival, and to his last breath in Gulu Independent hospital, at Gulu town Uganda, was at 1:08 am on 23/9/2018.

Born to the transient of Riroo generation of Dachuek, he was friend to Deng-ngueny (RIP), Mayen Dhieu (RIP), Deng Chol, Garang Nul and Mabior Nul (RIP), Mayendit among his peers was known as loyal, calm, respectful and strong-hearted person who bestowed his trust to everyone he come across both children and elders and his age mates. He was well known for praising everyone with his/her good names and this earned him helps, respect and rewarded him recognition among his peers. Having NO sister and brother, his life solely depend on Jehovah-Jireh.

Mayendit married my mother Lueth (Adongdit) Ngiewey Mabior in Panyiereeng (Wangulei), his marriage was not ceremonial as we did ours, for it was one man’s effort, his father, Arokdit didn’t shoulder Mayen’s responsibility of paying all dowries, he himself did everything at his disposal to settle his dowries, and that was the beginning of his independence. 

Mayendit is survived by his Children namely; Deng, Ajang, Nul, Manyok, Lual (myself), Garang (RIP), Mabior, Yar-Nyalam. His second wife, Alakiir, bore him Yarthi, Adut, Anyieth, Arok and Adit. He has grandchildren and the list goes..

Over several months of his absentia, I have thought about my dad, what he is mean to me in my life, and begun to fully appreciate him as a man, who was in his own quiet way, a role model and someone we could all learn from, to be a proud person in this world. He was gentle and caring, selfless and giving, ready to give hand to anyone he came across.

He faced life with all challenges without complaint, with his sweet-tempered nature. I was lucky to be able to spend a lot of my time by his bedside, many late quiet evenings; we would talk when he is able to, our talking always centered on my marriage and family unity. That when am married, eventually we would all arrange for Mabior, our last born to get married too.

As we can all imagine, raising 7 kids amidst sensation hunger and a quarantined homestead of our forefathers, whose journeys for better life elsewhere was regarded as domiciliary migration and no return expected, Mayendit could not attempt to leave anywhere. He tilled the ground for cereals for us to survive on.

He dragged us throughout 3 consecutive calamities i.e run apar, aboor aluany, Riek machar war on Dinka Bor 1991, and through the desert of Tingiling ramming through valleys to Amee displace camp in Magwi county. Dad was self-made and self-reliant. He never made enemies but was as strong as lion, he never once hit another man while in anger, he always insisted that violence never solved any grievances. 

Although he had an agony due to the loss of his mom and brother, he understood the value of co-existent as clansmen and the value of togetherness, the generosity he expressed with his kindness, matches the generosity of his spirit. Never will you meet a man who faithfully lived his values.

His character is the foundation of my conscience. Dad was usually fond of good jokes, including every imaginable kind of ethnic jokes, which were mean not to hurt nor humiliate anyone or community, he had never treated anyone with anything other than respect and kindness.

He was so proud of our mother and his visible affection overcoming his usual reserve. He well situated us before he moved any inch to elsewhere. He created perfect balance amidst us during our childhood and this made us who we are today as his loved children. 

As Mayendit faced his final days, his blood was ravaged by cancer, he occasionally lost his blood count as he fought the devastating disease, we could see him going but we choose to remain and elongate his legacy and generations, for we cannot manage to prevent death on him.

He surely went but this world was once lived and left by the greatest, Dad once came to me in a dream in july 23, he came and praises me as usual and went. Now that he is no more, we can sense his absent, we are now shakable because, when you have lost a greatest thing in your life, your center of gravity is permanently swayed.

It is difficult to imagine him not being around and I’m not sure how we will all cope. Exactly that and so much more will be missing from my father. 

My father was a hero whom good sons and daughters would be proud of, as tears roll down on us, I could see dad smiling, keeping his head high as forever. 

MAY YOUR LOVING SOUL REST IN PEACE!!

You can reach the author via his email address: lualmayendit56@gmail.com

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