Cultural Storm: Are South Sudanese Cultures and Traditions Withering Away Too Fast?
By Mayak Deng Aruei, USA
March 11, 2015 (SSB) — It’s 3 o’clock in the afternoon, and we are still dwelling in 9 o’clock, supposedly morning hours. Time has passed so quickly, and our cultures and traditions have slipped away unnoticed. As South Sudanese acquaint themselves with western education, and values that comes with such liberal education, what used to be the baseline no longer exists in the minds of the educated. Some have gone their ways while others have been too liberalized, and don’t care much about all that kept us intact. The hundred cows or equal value in money, and for a young lady is no longer a big deal.
There is more to customs and traditional practices that are far overdue. The world seemed to have moved far beyond, at least from the minds of people who see things in their own colors. Because most of those customs and traditions existed in an unwritten forms, universalized practices (the popular cultures) are finding their ways into African hidden world. From rights of children, women rights and right to choose partners. What else is left unexposed?
In the mighty South Sudanese’s world, things that matters the most are disappearing overnight, and nothing will be left for the coming generations to modify. There are too weakened cultural norms, let alone structures that support the communities. Like members of other societies in Africa, South Sudanese were the most conservative, have customs and traditions that give people their rightful credits and communities flourished within highly regarded cultural values.
All of that has faded away, and few who are too slow to react to the forces of the today’s world are dragging their feet, waiting for the second coming of the unknown man.
There is a big Storm coming our way, South Sudanese are getting too westernize, and their(our) customs and traditions are in triple jeopardy. For example, average South Sudanese girl used to and still cost roughly around $ 20,000 plus other commitments(amenities) expected in such relationships. Well, that is not too much if those customs and traditions that compel people to pay such prices are adhered to by the girls or by relatives who preside over such ceremonies.
Unfortunately, most of those highly priced marriages ended up in disarray, and neither the girls nor their relatives acknowledged the good will or the respect paid for and by those young men.
In those days, women have little says about their destinies because males family members used to decide who would be the right man for their daughter(s). And for sure, that does cuts against some fundamental rights. Until Year 2000, families pretty much consider girls as sources of pride because the kinds of wealth they generate increase the social values of their respective families. All of that changed when most girls finished primary schools and headed for High schools, and even University(college)level education.
Now, what do we have? The practices and traditions that made South Sudanese so unique in the face of this world are on fire! In all corners, and where South Sudanese live, females Body Bleaching, Body Piercing, thighs exposed and visible umbilical dots(regions) are as normal as eating out in restaurants.
The thirst for fame and money is bringing our cultures(South Sudanese) to standstill, has already collided them with other cultures. As recent as this week, some very irritating news have been floating on the internet(first South Sudanese gay and female Model publicized her private part online). Are we not going too far? Calm down, western democracy, liberal ideals are at the heart of what many see as too drastic a change.
Instead of racing against realities of the today’s world, people ought to be very open to them. Let’s us all be easy on all that come our ways, & address them as situations necessitate. As of now, girls are no longer willing to conform to parents/relatives’ preferences, and that has become the new reality. Take a look at protection camps in East Africa(Kenya & Uganda), and try to make sense of what is going on around there?
Adding to what some people considered to be disintegration of indigenous societies is western education and lifestyle that is spreading like wildfire across African continent and the Middle East. But, never mix this with the position of BOKO HARAM, those are ruthless religious fanatics who value women bodies than what they can offer to their society. There is some truth to the dissenting voices across the spectrum, but we should remember that reacting violently to such events is not the solution. We can agree that ladies who refuse to marry aged men deserve to voice such concerns, and be given second thought by relatives.
And again, age is not a problem by itself. Really? Mind you that western’s world Chief Executive Officers(CEOs) have mistresses, same thing as concubines in some parts of the world, but it doesn’t stir up much except in politics or when unwelcome advances have been recorded.
Nowadays, some ladies don’t give relatives chances to take in wealth at their expenses. Ask folks who were fooled to follow other’s people choices. Guess what? In some extreme cases, men paid and never get what they paid for! How many times do we really want to see people wrestling to get their dowries back? With that being the case, quite a number of hardworking guys from the western world have been ripped off, and nobody seemed to sympathize with the kind of financial situations that they(men) are often put in.
But let’s not generalize, let’s blame those people who invest in fancy, expensive and unstable marriage more than they do to education or health.
Bear with me, and keep right while approaching the exit. True as that, modernity is armed with sophisticated social challenges, and taking them down one by one is not an easy thing to be done. That is to say, what takes place in one family or in a given section of a particular community does not stay there. In almost every place where South Sudanese reside in the world, nothing goes unnoticed and that has become the new social platform for future dealings.
Because young generation of South Sudanese tend to debate almost anything, the secrets that used to be part of the larger Society are no longer being kept in a locked box.
It is very unfortunate that bedrooms (private stuffs) are now playing grounds. I have to notice that talking about cohabitation, homosexuality and polygamy are not our priorities right now, but stable families are the backbone of any nation. So, let’s try to fix what is integral to our well-being as South Sudanese.
As cultures and traditions come under attack, without enough preparations in place, our Nation would be too distressed because raising children on the go, and in the middle of nowhere do hurts children’s growth and development. Since there are no stable primary and secondary schools in South Sudan, most of affluent families are schooling their kids in East Africa. What will you have?
A bunch of foreign educated South Sudanese would be moving to South Sudan when normalcy returned. And because of that, a gradual change would have been necessary if we have a stable nation where we follow our own customs and practices with less diversion.
While addressing those changes in good faith is very important, South Sudanese must know that raising a family in this time of ours is a huge responsibility. It involves sending kids to school, paying for their medical needs, giving them best experiences in term of places that they should visit, the kind of exposures that they need for their betterments and everything else that would make them competitive in life. All those, if calculated in monetary term would be many times the price of dowry(the average of 65 cows in South Sudan).
Hey, nobody is against the dowry per se, but since ladies are driving too fast, somewhat offline, they(ladies) deserve to be given their choices so that they play by the rules. That may sounds odd for polygamists who don’t envision future of their children, and who don’t mind about the kinds of lives they would be leading.
Let’s get our house together, and debate things in a more civilized way. That is, no need for female writers to fight back, the context in which those references were made is very important. In the middle of all the crises (political and social shakeups), all must consider how to live life in a meaningful way.
At the present time, some activists, energized by being too few nags around the clock, accusing South Sudanese men of being wild, marrying multiple wives and not taking care of them. Don’t they know that females in South Sudan are more than 66% of the total population?
Considering the recent madness(ongoing war in South Sudan), percentage may be now a little bit higher because men have finished themselves fighting for the presidency? Well, that is a different story, and marriage in the western world is not the same as what we have in South Sudanese communities(tribes & sub-tribes have different customs). But yeah, never blame men who still have taste to house multiple wives at the same time. Imagine those slim girls who never gain weights, not even after taking in tons of sugarcoated foods, and never have to shave their legs?
Oops, would that be a sin? With things the way they are, men can have as many women as they want, but those women should enter into those relationships as they choose, and be abided by the choices they make. There are lots of struggles between young girls and their parents, and that tends to create mixed feelings across the board.
Just a little tip to folks who seemed too carried away. There is no, and there will no welfare in South Sudan in the nearest time. So, let’s are catch up with the world, and be able to have a decent life, free of cattle-rustling and child abduction or senseless wars that consume too many of our youths for political reasons.
Instead of paying too much attention to skyrocketing dowry prices, people getting married outside our communities, gays and lesbians emerging in our societies, why not we deal with such methodically, and seek explanations from members who deviate from long held customs and practices?
For those preparing themselves for expensive weddings, life has changed for good and planning for the future ought to be started very early. It is of a prime importance that people adopt things that will add value to our traditions rather than borrowing things that create unnecessary dramas. Why don’t they(females and males) convince the goddamn world within their reach, and as to why Xs are the most preferred soul-mates?
Back in the day, sex was more than a taboo in our society, but rapid change in people’s attitudes has brought everything to the surface. Now, sex for money is everywhere in South Sudan, foreigners and strayed South Sudanese girls (divorcées) are auctioning their Goldmines, making money on irresponsible males who don’t want to take care of unproductive ladies. Believe it or not, there are gays and lesbians in South Sudanese Society plus uncounted number of people living with HIV/AIDS.
On top of that, narcotics drugs Users have been recorded in South Sudan, and other places where South Sudanese live. Yes, we have our own country, and citizens must learn how to be abided by our own laws(cultural and State’s statutes), take charge of their health, educate the civil population to live in harmony, and take advantage of the globalization of everything. So, this topic should not be regarded as offensive or unnecessary at this particular time in the history of our existence as South Sudanese. All must conform to requirements of the today’s world or be overwhelmed by kinds of problems that will emerge in the near future.
At the national level, stealing has been glorified, institutionalized, and it is called corruption in foreign language. And we know that South Sudanese used to treat thieves differently, used to give them dirty looks, disrespected publicly, had hard times finding ladies and were ridiculed in most cases.
Now, those thieves called themselves new elites, the “jobless millionaires” as they are known by the outside world. On the same line, murderers(warlords and lowlife Thugs who move with winds) are given highest protection by the laws, rewarded for killing innocents and their social statuses are raised instantly. That is how far we have traveled.
To stitch these pieces together, it is about right time for South Sudanese to rethink the drastic shifts that appeared to have caught them(us) by surprise and completely unprepared. The more people shy away from real social issues, the more communities become too disintegrated and unable to deal with crises. It hurts no one if the kind of changes taking place are accepted, and adjustments made based on particular needs in a given time.
Sooner or later, everyone will realize the dramas caused by the unregulated social markets, and where women appears to be double-dealing, and men arrogantly taking advantage of women’s economic conditions. The recent announcement of the first open gay in South Sudanese Society is a call that should not be ignored. And for sure, we have moved too fast, and at a speed that I termed to be too ‘thrilling.’ Say no to discrimination, and yes to equal protection of the law.
As our society flourish, odd things will be part of us and we got to look beyond the glaring lines. The content is passive because nothing is new under the sun, and we ought to be mindful that we don’t live in an isolated world. Live healthy, be productive and think around the clock!
-Love you Junubiin, you have moved Mountains and filled Valleys!
The author is Mayak Deng Aruei, a social and a political commentator, and a doctoral student in Organizational Leadership: Organization Development. He is also the author of ‘Struggle Between Despair and Life: From Sudan’s Marshland Village, Child Soldiering, Refugee Camp and America.’ He can be reached at kongor.da.@gmail.com
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